I think being aware of it is step 1. Step 2 probably is asking questions, rather than providing suggestions. In my example above, instead of saying "here, do this" I should ask "what makes you feel that way?" This really ties into listening, so again, more practice on that.
So...
Your step 1 , is my step 2...
My step 1, would be asking a hard question of myself....
Step 1 - WHY am I like that ?
Step 2 - Being aware
Step 3 - Asking questions
Step 4 - Stopping controlling behaviors
Are you with me ????
I hope so, cause I already know my answers, and that would look kinda creepy, if I sit here with a "Breakdown" costume on, trying to think like you....