WHG: And so we file...

[workinghardguy]

Guess today could have been worse. Still sad and heartbroken. Up too late because I just don't want to go to sleep.

Docs are signed and filed. Now the fourth month waiting period starts. Five months to the day that she moved out we are separated. And if we get a court date right at the end of that four month window then I'll get to have the divorce as my birthday present. Yay me.

Went over to my mom's tonight and had dinner. S is attending a day camp near her so he's been staying with her all week. He's always in such a good mood. Lots of squeezes and fun helped, but I just couldn't pull myself completely out of the melancholy.

I know it will pass, I hope it will pass. Tomorrow's another day. And if my family is meant to be pieced back together then that is what will happen. If it isn't meant to be, well, then it isn't.

I sat today and tried really hard to remember good times with my W. It was hard. Guess that tells me something. Not that all I could recollect were bad times, but I also couldn't recollect really good times. There were some... our son being born, the last getaway when we found out she was pregnant, when I proposed, our wedding day, Christmas times. But there were far fewer than I would hope.

I remember who she was when we met. Who she was the first four years or so. And I contrast that to who she is now and they are just so different. I don't get it.