He is back to putting her first, only spent one night at home and was right back to her pretty much. I started looking for an apartment to move into, but he didn't like that idea because he wants me to stay in the house. He said he doesn't want a relationship with me right now, but doesn't want a divorce or to be separated, but he still has her.
I read his text messages to her and he told her he considered growing old with her, having children with her and he wants her in his life forever. I have been maintaing distance, and even consulted with a lawyer for the cost of a divorce. Told him the information and he was upset, says thats not what he wants.
I texted him this information, and he got upset with me because OW read it and he could tell she was happy about it and then stared demanding what we were planning because she has a right to know, so whatever.
He called me 14 times on my phone this morning, and I didn't answer. I went out last Saturday and he is noticing. I am starting to move on, preparing myself. A divorce would be costly and we don't really have that kind of money. Plus to be honest, I would be the one to suffer the most, while he would probably get everything and then she would probably live with him here in our house.
He wants to pick out paint colors this weekend because paint is on sale, but its seems odd when our future is up in the air and he wants a divorce he wants to pick out house colors. He told me he thinks he has a problem, like he is a sociopath. Like he doesn't have the ability to connect with people emotionally.
I don't know. He met me at work to talk for a few minutes, and he looked at me and was almost going to cry. He said I love you and I miss you and I don't want to lose you, I am miserable but I don't know what to do to end it with her. I told him simple you tell her the truth. His actions don't prove anything like him wanting me. He hugged me very sweetly and said I miss you so much as he was leaving.
thats all I got for now.
M-28 H-28 M-9 1/2 years T- 12 years PA- 01/02/12 (still going on)
