I'm in North Carolina so I've been subjected to the year long separation that on paper started 8/27/11. I say on paper because we didn't physically separate until late September, but given the legalities involved during this nonsense, I was forceably coerced into signing the separation agreement she put forward, which protected her (no debt) and the OM (alienation of affection) unfortunately.
She is still with the OM she started the affair with. This is my boundary, I will not be married to a woman who is this disrespectful to me in the face of the things I have done for her and my 3 stepchildren. I own my role in the downfall of our marriage. By my W own admission however, the good outweighed the bad.
I see your point that filing should be a last resort. I am at the end of my rope. My sitch is much more ridiculous than most. I definitely accept either outcome now, I will be fine and happy either way. If she chooses to sign and file and continue with OM or the next bloke that comes along, I hope that her decision making works out in the best interest of her and my stepkids in the long run. I'm also of the opinion of if filing doesn't shake her lose, then nothing I can do ever will.
So 40 days to go to for me, I'm going totally dark for this period which will include her birthday, and will see what happens.
me 38 W 30 T 3 M in 05/2010 Separated 08/2011 Stephchildren (all hers) SS17, SS12, SD8 I filed 8/27, she countered I filed response 9/5 Anxiously waiting on the judge!
