The Adventures of GH31, Wife and Baby

[GH31]

Hi there all,

Not sure if anyone remembers me but I still lurk around here from time to time and have a read.

Time is very short now though with my wife, children and work using up pretty much all of my time. I also avoid spending too much time on the computer.

"Doing what works" and being ever vigilant is the life philosophy I try to live by. If you fall off the wagon (which you will every so often) then you get back on ASAP.

I have forgiven my wife for everything. Much of the "sitch" is a distant memory now. We even went back to the city where we lived when everything fell apart for a few days, for no other reason than we had some things we needed to do there, and I experienced no negative emotions. 4 years ago I swore blind I would never set foot in that place again. I took that as a good sign that things had moved on.

Still, I take it one day at a time and never take anything for granted. I once thought my wife would just love me for ever and never leave, no matter how much of an abusive jerk I was, and I had the rudest awakening of my life. There is no way that I will ever believe that again, in this world or the next.

Other than my family, creating prosperity at work and saying money is the next major focus.

I have found there are some wonderful resources out there. I have read The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman countless times and use it essentially as a marriage philosophy, especially the Chapters Turning Toward and Allow Your Partner to Influence You.

I listen to my wife, consider her point of view in all decisions I make and when she starts a conversation (usually with an opening question or statement) I say "Tell me more....." and she does.

Vigilance, vigilance, vigilance. No taking things for granted. I still will never call myself a success story because the journey is never over. The landscape changes but the journey itself does not stop - it never does and it is very dangerous to think otherwise.