How Should I respond to her advances

[Arsene]

It looks like my stuff doesn't get posted for some reason. No worries, I guess it's still a relief just to write this stuff down and get it out.
I finally got home at the end of our 2-month trip, and 6 weeks after being dumped by e-mail. My W managed to meet me and D8 at the airport and i have to say i had all sorts of stories in my head as to how it would go and it ended up just being...nice.
Of course D8 ran to meet her mom and hugs and kisses were exchanged and I put on a brave face. In fact, for the last 2 days that it had taken by plane and at airports, just to get where we were, I had come up with a mantra in my head:"There is no past and there is no future, just the present". This helped me not anticipate the worst, or the best possible scenario. Before coming up with the mantra, I'd imagine W hugging me and then kissing me tenderly telling me what a fool she had been and that she loved me more than ever. On the other hand, the next scenario had her picking me up with her lover, who I was expected to be friendly with. of course, none of this happened and I was glad that W came to me (I'd also cone a lot of meditation on the way and displayed ...poise) smiling my best smile, but not too much, she then gave me a nice hug, which I returned and which she kept much longer than was needed to make me feel better. That part really was nice. Then we exchanged platitudes about the trip while walking to the car and she asked me if I'd had a nice holiday. What was there to say? Two weeks into this holiday, she herself emailed me that she didn't want to be married with me anymore and left me with that. OK, we'd been going through what I think is an MLC for nearly 2 years but still. I was shocked. Then, before saying too much, I realise that she was probably as nervous as i was and was saying anything so I didn't say too much and answered that it hadn't been the greatest holiday but that a lot of good had come out of it. The drive home was quiet but no problems arose which is always good.
We got home, put the girl to bed and then (silly me!!!) I said that hopefully we could talk about this at some point when she is ready. To this she asked if it was necessary and i said that I needed it to have some sort of closure and she said she was ready. I got scared and started to talk about our living arrangements and there it got a bit funny when I told her that I wasn't going back to my job but decided to do what i'd always wanted to do. Play music for a living (which was had been our plan before the holiday - she's also a musician and we had an act together and one of the reasons for her leaving was for her to get more freedom to work on her career). I said I realised that my income would go down but that my D8 and myself could manage well enough but that she (W) would probably need to contribute a bit. She got a bit mad and was about to call me all the names in the book but then, I think she realise she had no rights to do as she, herself was doing just this. after a few tears, she told me she was shocked and that she wasn't expecting that (I'm not nearly as good as the music thing as she is) but that it was her fault for thinking tht i would cover all the expenses. Then we started talking about the logistics of things and things got a bit sour as we realised that 2 households to pay for is more difficult to manage than just one. In the end, she left by bicycle for the room she rents a few kilometers away. She seemed frustrated and unhappy. Part of me looked at this as a victory but after thinking about it again, I felt sad, that i had just put the woman i love through this.

It would be great to hear your comments, if this gets posted someday. Sorry. It's just that I feel like I'm talking/writing to a wall.