I'm interested in whether you've had two sessions with T or one? Because you came back from the session with T very upset, angry, and thinking there was no hope and then you drop in that H has said he sees your changes and think it could work?!
So are you only concentrating on the negatives? Why didn't you put just as much stock if not more into H's positive statements as you did his negative ones about the sitch?
IMHO and feel free to tell me to get my nose out...you can't talk to anyone in H's life about your M. It's not fair to them or him and it's not something a person of character and class does. Those are his parents. He will always be their baby bit even if he's sitting on death row. When I was at my LOWEST I made sure MIL never saw me crack I was dressed great, house clean, losing weight, and making jokes. I knew it would get back to H. Do you want them to think of you as well adjusted and happy or as controlling and unhappy?
If a person (and I was a walk a way do I remember) is doing something they already feel bad or guilty about and other people tell them it's wrong they will stand by their decision, defensively, bull headed, etc because it's like a teenager rebelling and they can't tell you what to do.
You say you can't help yourself from trying to influence his decision to have an OW because it affects you and your kids so do much, but you know what will also affect you and your kids so so much? If you drop the rope. Allow yourself to be free mentally of worrying, trying to control the outcome, and if you be and happy and whole no matter what happened 5 years from now.
How would things change right now if someone told you I've seen the future you never get back together? The more you try to create an outcome the less likely it is to happen.
You want an H that chooses you no one you forced to be with you.
