If there is an OM, then little is likely to change until he's gone. And then it may take a while after he's gone, as she will mourn that loss for a while.
In the mean time, she is likely to not want to really connect with you, because she'd probably think she's cheating on the OM.
Bizarre, yet that often seems to be the case.
Third time's a charm?
You mention you are frustrated. Understandable. Yet you feel you may have blown it, so you sound like you're not ready to be done, yet.
You're doing a pretty classic "man" thing and running away into the cave and ignoring your W. That may not be the best idea.
She could have called any number of people, I'm sure, to check her phone. Yet... she chose to call you.
So my best guess is, she's trying to be sure you are still there for her (just in case) or she really is reaching out and trying to connect with you, yet... you've shut her out... because you feel hurt...
Often we talk about the pursuit / distance dance here. And how that can be a crazy cycle that should be stopped.
I wonder, in your case, if perhaps you need to let her catch you.
Do you really believe you have always "been there" for your W? Or is you holing yourself up in your man cave a pattern for you, when she just wants your attention?
