No Expectations No Plans Being Okay No Matter What

[zig]

maybe she meant - ask for help when you need it - makes him feel like a hero - but not appear needy?

recently i started asking h to do little things - things that i know he can kind of handle, in his anxiety state - like return s's violin to the rental store, or could you drop s off to his class since you're here anyway.

while i was dim - i made it a huge point to act as if i was completely independent and needed nothing from him - absolutely nothing from him - and i think it made him feel bad. otoh - i try to ask for very little mundane things which don't put pressure on him

i don't know, maybe that's not what she meant. you'll have to ask her next time you talk. sometimes i think we don't "get" something until we are ready to understand it or ready to do it.

btw - been meaning to ask - how many times have you spoken w/ cheryl? once? and how long before you make the next apptmt - and what will your criteria be to make the next one? i'm asking because i'm wondering if i should make one pretty soon or stretch it out and wait a while

also - don't go into trying to do more - whatever you are doing right now, is working amazingly for increased contact and a move towards you - so stay still, right

if you read back - the interactions are increasing at quite the rate there - it's impressive!!

((((( )))))
zig