Tad I understand what it is to listen to your children vent about their parent and to feel their pain and hurt. Unfortunately for you, you have a young one and share custody. YES I said Unfortunately! At one time after my divorce I would have given anything to have contact with my xh. I didnt have a custody issue so I had NO REASON to talk to him. I was sad that we didnt talk. NOW....I see that I was VERY FORTUNATE!!!! Because him forcing NO CONTACT helped me move on faster. That is what they mean by detaching. It REALLY DOES help. You cant imagine it at the time but it is a BLESSING in Disguise.
Tad it took me 3 years! to really and truly not think about what my xh was doing. When my son lived with him, I was fixed on trying to win him back, but other than that, I didnt care. It took 3 years though to get to that point. I havent thought about my xh other than in a Fatherly way in a LONG time. AND believe me I wasnt about detaching. I thought I was going to die when he left. I was way worse than you. BUT look at me now. It DOES get better Tad. The less you hear about her or see her, the faster it happens. BUT regardless it WILL HAPPEN! One step at a time Tad. Be thankful that you dont have to deal with a baby issue. What helped me was when one thing hit me, I got thru it and moved onto the next. She moved in with xh.....made it thru it. They got married.....shew hard, but made it thru it. They got pregnant.....wow, made it thru it.
YOU WILL TOO!!!!!!!! One step at a time! Stop Rushing yourself, it will come.
As far as the empty nest.....Listen you are putting the cart before the horse. You could be Married before then Tad. The world could end. Jesus could come back tomorrow. Stop thinking of what is gonna happen months from now. Deal with today, then tommorrow and etc.
I know you see her Life as a ray of sunshine. BUT it really isnt. You are not with her OR inside her head. I thought the same thing about my xh getting married. NOT FAIR I thought. How come he did this and I am still suffering and he has a Happy Little Home. Not Always True! You will be better in the long run than she EVER WILL BE. Unless she gets Help.
Enjoy being alone awhile Tad. Something I didnt do but am now experiencing. I love me and my life now. Imagine that. lol
