Thanks Brookie. I appreciate your comments, as well as everyone else who has chimed in....especially Mach1.
Originally Posted By: Brookie
If I may, I see that you are reading a lot of books on just about everything. And I am all for knowledge is power. But, the thing is, you cant let all this consume you.
It will make you craaazzzzy.
There are a few ways to figure out what you want to change about you. One of them is to take those things that your w has said and think about which ones are valid.
True...I have dug into books like crazy, and it has been thought provoking mostly. Usually I get a little out of each one...a book on trust helped me with negative thoughts, for example.
With that said, the only problem that has really caused is that I can see different perspectives, and it can confuse me. With regards to who I am, my wife loves who I have become over the last few years. She said "If you were this person 5 years ago, we wouldn't be here." The problem is that she cannot get over the past...she can't seem to forgive me for my errors, and she can't seem to get past the fact that she has said she's done....in her mind, once she said it, she has to stick to it. The initial bomb was Feb 2011...and she still tells me over and over that she was done then and hasn't changed her mind.
Now, with that said, she has been happy to act like a couple in every way for the most part, even trying to improve some of her negative behaviors. But when we have a bump, we're right back to "I can't get over the past."
