TIME for a change

[Broken74]

Thanks Vorlon that means a lot, I greatly appreciate it. I can't say I feel like the hammer yet, but I am certainly done being the nail, and I do feel much better. I have been seeking closure to this one way or the other, and I have the proof that allowed me to settle it now. One of your posts for me personally has been the most valuable thing I have read on these boards.

1. You are the prize
2. You are a good man that any good woman would want
3. You can't change the past
4. If your W is unhappy that is her problem to deal with
5. If you have issues, fix them but not for her
6. There is always someone else who will apprcieate you
7. There is always someone else in worse shape than you
8. If you want to be happy fix YOU first. You can't fix her.
9. Decide if you want to be married to the alien that has become your wife..If so, why in the world would you want that???
10. The sooner you get your head on straight and realize you can handle life without your current wife. The sooner you will get the wife you want and deserve. That may or may not be your current wife.
11. The pain will not go away or lessen until you face these things and take action.
12. It is all up to you. You decide how long you suffer. This is not negotiable.

I laminated this and it is now the bookmark in my bible, if I ever lose it I'll be making another one. Thank you for this.

I'm going to check out the NMMNG forum. That book pegged me like no other or no one ever has. After reading that it's no surprise why I found myself into this situation. I "nice guyed" my way into a marriage with an extremely materialistic and manipulative woman. Then I had resentment which fueled my drinking and verbal abuse because I didn't feel appreciated for all of the "nice guy" things I was doing. If I hadn't started with the "nice guy" treatment from the start I am confident we would have never gotten married, I am sure she would have passed me by for a more lucrative host.

This has been a long hard road, certainly the hardest trial I have been through in my 38 years of life. You and many others have helped me through it and I thank you all. I am just happy that the finish line is in sight now.

Thanks again and good luck to all in your respective sitch's!