Attended S10's baseball tournament today which consisted of 2 games today and 2 tomorrow. I came with my son and W showed up later because she was doing a kick boxing class. Both games were dreadful, (hot, humid and the boys played terrible both games).
My W sat with some of the mom's while I stayed mostly clear, sitting with a friend at the other end of the bleachers. We eventually had some friendly banter and at one point she even offered to buy me a soda in exchange for some of the bubble gum I had brought with me to the game.
At one point I caught a glimpse of my W and from my POV she seemed sad and/or lonely. I may be totally mis-reading this but that it how it seemed. Later, after the games were done, we went out to grab a very late lunch. The conversation was light and S10 seemed to enjoy having his parents undivided attention.
W really seems to be trying to get her sh!t together in terms of doing things that do her some good, (i.e. exercise classes and socialization with other women). She has been doing 2-3 classes each week. This is a significant from the past where she might do one class a month if even that!
It is interesting though that a pattern of behavior that was evident before the bomb, is still in play today. It involves what I would characterize as my W's overly dramatic attention to little children. She seems to use them as a means to avoid or limit adult contact. In social settings where there are children and adults present, I'd say she will spend 60% of her time socializing with the children. It is almost like it is an escape for her. I don't know what to make of it. It has always struck me as a little odd.
So that's about it for now. I'll update more when there is more to report.
Me51 W53 S17 S14 M22 T25 Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11
It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.
Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife
