wanted to add - and this made me really feel good - not just for db'ing but also for myself.
i remember reading somewhere that when other people talk to the WAS about their LBS in a really positive way, it can make the WAS start to question what they are doing.
so tonight friend described to me how her husband (h's closest friend that he spends the most time with) has been talking about me to her.
she said "he is just in complete awe of your changes. he'll walk up to me and say - "that zig, shake his head in wonder, it's just amazing, i've never seen anything like it." then he'll go sit down , almost speechless, then get up and come back to her again and say " it's amazing, zig is in such a good place , i can't believe this is happening" shake his head and get speechless and repeat this over and over.
i was really surprised. ever since we reconnected - i've met friend several times but only met her h twice - and he saw all of that.
i joked and said to friend - hopefully he's telling that to h. and she said oh i'm sure he is.
on the other hand, she told me something that made me just gulp and actually be really upset with my h. she said when they would come over, h would meet them at the door and say - you better be quiet and on your best behavior because zig is in bad shape and in a really bad mood. (this was after the accidents and i was in really bad shape)
i couldn't believe it - i asked her did he actually say those words to you - and she said not to me but to my h and he would tell me and then we would all tiptoe around you.
i felt so angry - i found myself starting to explain my side to her, saying well what you don't realize is that it was because he was yelling at me because i was anxious because the spasms were bad, and the house was a mess and i couldn't cope with all the stuff that needed to be ready before the guests arrived. she was a bit shocked.
i found myself just starting to get into what was the horror for me during the years of post-concussion crap where h would pick fights with me and keep at me no matter how much i begged that we stop until my brain could come out of overload.
but luckily i didn't go there and stopped and said - no i'm not going to get into bad-mouthing h right now.
and that's when h and the others walked up!!!
me 46 H 38 M10yrs T 11 S10 BD ow 8/11 h filed 9/25/12
"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"
