I was telling a friend of mine recently how hard it was for me to make all these decisions. I’ve always been fairly decisive. I am not the kind of person that will go look at a TV 10 times before I purchase. (In other words, I am good at making up my mind). But not right now! Every decision seems painstaking. Who knows, it’s probably because I am stressed and because I care. My friend also told me how much I am trying and if things don’t work out with W, it’s not due to a lack of effort.
I am glad I received Accurays advice. Knowing me, I would have asked my wife for a receipt today. I am going to wrap it all in one and bring it up in the counseling session on Monday.
The “Preview” comment is great. It’s just so easy to want to spit them out of my mouth. My 180’s are goals of mine. I need to remember to not mention anything to W right now about my goals. In my mind, if I avoid mentioning goals, that’s what will help me avoid bringing up 180’s, if that makes sense.
Yes, I want to get things upbeat again. The last week has been far from upbeat for both W and I. It was a great question about what else will be discussed in the counseling session. This is really good stuff so I am prepared.
Ok, let’s see if I am listening and learning. I am planning on going to the session with a smile on my face. I will ask questions, listen and I will work on keeping it business like. I think it’s good to keep the entire session finance/kids related. I will remain strong and confident and I WILL MAKE SURE TO AVOID RELATIONSHIP TALK. If she brings it up, that’s fine. I will give short and simple answers and leave it at that. I think it’s a very dangerous road to go down and it’s amazing how even a small R talk can cause big trouble. I haven’t had an issue with it anytime recently but I’ve learned about the “dangers” from everything I’ve read on this board. Am I on the right track here?
Note to self:
I am hoping for the best but I have no expectations. I will always be able to one day tell my kids with every ounce of confidence that I fought like no other for our marriage!!!!! In my mind, that’s a very powerful statement and I should be proud of myself for what I am doing.
Me(M):38 W:43 Together: 14 Married: 11 D: 4 S:8 W wanted separation 5/5/12 Stopped living together 5/5/12 Currently in DB stage
“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude”. Thomas Jefferson
