So this is why I love this place. I was posting on someone else's thread and had a revelation about my own sitch!
Thanks GRACE!
You know how it really got under my skin when H said "please don't be mad" I think this is why...
Which is why when H said "please don't be mad" in a text the other day because he's used to feisty Brit pulling her earrings off and throwing shoes (not literally!) Instead I said I hate that you assume that of me. I'm not going to do that and I'm sorry if I did in the past.
I think I got upset because he was reminding me of the behaviour that I feel like I've grown past. I've learned to be still rather than react, I've learned to trust instead of being suspicious that people are using me, I've started to "assume the good"
He was telling me I EXPECT you to be angry and spiteful, I EXPECT you to see me as using you as a place to store my stuff instead of knowing that I am going to move it out with I have the other vehicle fixed.
And it hurt me because I've grown and he still doesn't see it or believe it.
And instead of knowing why it was upsetting me I did get angry and frustrated at him (but only put it on the boards!) I was actually upset because he was reminding me of my faults and behaviour I'm not proud of.
Wow. It paid off though. I reassured him but not reacting that way, instead apologising for my past actions and stating that it was hard to know he felt that way. And then when he came over telling him that I don't think that way at all. He immediately back tracked both times and said no, no I didn't think you did.
And I think that was him bracing himself and then saying of course I know Brit is a nice person. And then today we had positive interaction.
Why does no one teach you this stuff when you're 12?
