Sorry my friend. I think your wrong on that opinion that OM is not a threat.
Here is what OM does.
1. Enables your WAS. 2. Drives a knife between you two. 3. Fills her EN's 4. Takes away from your EN's 5. Leaves you in Limbo. 6. Costs time and money. 7. Is a physical danger to you and your children. 8. Is taking time and energy away from your children. 9. Is building resentment. 10. Can lead to OM2. 11. While in the picture you cannot work on repairing your marriage.
Failing to take this parasite seriously is a mistake.
Your main problem in your marriage is that your wife is committing adultery.
That is the number one issue in your marriage.
If it is not.
Then embrace an open marriage and you both go do your own thing.
And see how quickly it falls apart then.
BINGO.
407, you've questioned (or at least listed it as a "positive") that your wife doesn't talk about divorce. Why WOULD she, when she gets all of her emotional and physical needs met by her OM, and the rest of her emotional and financial needs met by YOU? She cheats on you and you take her on a nice vacation???
To each his own, but I personally would never live in an open marriage. Once you know (about the affair), and your wife KNOWS that you know, the marital dynamic is VERY destructive, in my opinion, from that point forward. Because it saps away at YOUR self-respect and emotional health, and your wife -- I can assure you -- is rapidly losing attraction for a man who would just passively allow her to cheat on him. And since women tie their feelings of "love" VERY closely to their feelings of "respect," I would contend that she is even losing love for you with your "well, there's nothing I can do about it, so I might as well just be nice her to her" attitude.
