Any chance to make it work? I need advice

[sweetbabyred]

I really do need to be less available.

Once the house sells, H will probably be moving about 20 miles away, so unless he comes to me, I won't see him much.

For the last few days, he hasn't talked to me much, but I think that's because the girl he thought he'd lost a friendship with has decided to still hang out with him.

Since cute young girl has apparently given him another chance, at least as friends, he doesn't need to see me. Guess he's not as lonely now.

Funny thing is, he and her friends went rope climbing/ cliff diving(!) on Sunday and H cut his foot all up. Calls me to come over and see him. I was busy getting stuff ready for the next day, so I went over about two hours later.

H apparently couldn't even bandage up his foot until I got there to help him get bandages (in the medicine cabinet first aid kit, no less). So this girl is a lot of fun to hang out with, but he can't get bandages from her?

Even he made a comment that he was too old to be doing stuff like that.

I'm just getting really sick of seeing charges to Hooters, bars, and fun places like bowling alleys on the joint credit card when he's broke from not working for almost two months.

H mentioned today that he might close out his retirement accounts so that he can help me close on the house and still be able to pay for classes in the fall.

Ok, but maybe he should stop drinking, smoking, and spending money all the time. Then his money would have gone a lot further.

He was so happy to finally become debt free from all of his student loans right after we got married. We even volunteered at three Dave Ramsey events together.

It's just such a change to know that his own cards are carrying balances right now and he hasn't paid child support since it was last taken out of his check in May.

H would have to do a few 180s of his own for me to be willing to try again at this point.

I need to remind myself to detach, detach. He's getting himself into this mess. If he decides he wants out, he has to do it himself. Life seems fun now, but eventually the bills will have to be paid, in more ways than one.