wow...thanks mach. that also brought tears to my eyes. i am not going to be that lady under the hair dryer. i am not even angry. i am thankful for all that has happened in my life. all this bad sh1t. without it, i wouldnt be who i am today. i have gotten so strong. i dont have any hope for my M. i have given up on that. i hope to be happy. to be a GREAT dad. someone that my kids are proud to have in their life. i want them to know how to live a healthy happy life. i havent given up on me. will i ever R with my W? who knows and i dont care. i do not think i even want that anymore. i deserve to be happy and be loved for me. i dont believe she ever truly loved me, or really knows what love is. i do hope to be great co parents one day. i am not mad at her. i should thank her. because of her i have started down this road of being awesome! i am free. free of her and free in my mind. i can dress how i want. i can listen to the music i want. do what i want. i have control of me and i like that. i did some serious meditation last night. it helped alot. i thanked god for this opportunity to be me. i really like that quote and i identify with it. i bang my head on walls until i find a solution. being able to accept things these days is a huge gift.
i had a great day at work. i was happy. i actually still love what i do and am damn good at it when i focus. it was a beautiful day. i am going to work out and run.
thank you brit for sticking with me. you do inspire me everytime i read your posts.
bug..what can i say? you are amazing. you have been with me for awhile. picking me up when i am down. putting up with my bs.. setting me straight when i need it. i dont even know you and you have done so much for me. thank you.
