I'm a new person

[2chiquitos]

Now that I truly have no expectations, I'm just not interested or looking forward to his visits. weird. I thought I didn't have expectations before but before I would get excited when he would come over and I would get excited when he would plan family outings.

Now I'm like ugh, whatever...
I don't say this to him but he can tell I'm not as eager about these outings as before. He'll ask me, why? what do you think? is it a good idea?

I try to act as if and say, yeah, yeah, it's good.

I told my sister about D1 bday plans. Her first ques. Who's going? My ans-I'm not playing this game. Sis-I want to know so that we know if we can go or not. Me-like I said, I'm not playing this game. (turns out she has to work late that day)

I have to put my boundaries or else it's just screwing me up with my recovery. THAT'S RIGHT FAMILY!! IT'S ALL ABOUT MY RECOVERY!!! NOT ABOUT YOU!!!