This no contact thing is really confusing. The cycle goes like this: I start by thinking that by not ringing I am saying I don't care that she's left so I'm confirming her decision to blame me for everything. Then I think all I'll do is make her feel better anyway or that she's enjoying her green grass that I'll feel rubbish. Then I think well she should ring me first after all she's causing all this. Then I think but what if she's feeling too guilty? If I don't ring then we'll not talk again till she wants furniture. So, maybe I should ring in the spirit of making the first move? Then I think every time I've made an effort she put the barriers up anyway, so I'm better off not ringing. And then I go back to the start of the cycle.
Right now, I'm close to the making the first move stage. I'll see how I feel tomorrow before I do anything though.
