is this the end....trying not to give up

[Cadet]

You are right, I have been really depressed for a while.

As such i have had the 'can't think of anything i'd like to do or anyone i'd like to do it with' mentality for a while now.

OK this is good, in that the first step to helping yourself is to be able to look in the mirror and identify what you need top work on.

I think that is the hardest thing, and you already have started.

Now it will be easier to identify what you want to work on.

I will help - first thing - YOU!

PPD can be long or short, I do not know how it will affect you.
Maybe talk to your doctor but in the mean time I like that you are changing your diet and thinking about getting out and about.

Possibly look into St John's wort or B vitamins.
This has really helped a friend of mine.

Understand that we are just brainstorming here so take what you need and leave the rest.

Good job so far.

Keep us POSTED!

[tonibertha]

Can't believe it's a week since i had time to post...

Went for a meetup last Friday, it was great! met a few people that i'm not sure i'll see again, but it was nice to have a drink in a social atmosphere. Really did wonders for my PMA!

Havent heard from H. Trying to focus on myself and the things i want to acheive. The week has been so busy, but i feel great:

- The house is looking much tidier
- Really enjoying cooking, even bought a food processor!
- Popped in to have a look at the library last week, will register soon, lots of books for me and DD (i'm an avid reader!)
- visiting my brother this saturday
- going to a 'baby rave' with DD on Sunday. its basically a dance meetup for parents and kids. Looking forward to it..

[tonibertha]

Just a quick question....

I had asked H in April to help me keep any mail that arrived for me in the old house, and he agreed. I need my mail now because my car registration document and tax disc should be among the mail he is keeping for me. The olympics start in 3 weeks (I live quite close to the venue), and vehicle controls are going to be quite strict. I don't want to have to pay a fine for no displaying my tax disc.

So now i have two options

- Contact H and arrange to get my mail from him

or

- Request replacement documents (which will cost me £32 (app or $50)

I would appreciate suggestions as to which option I should take. I have had no contact with H for about 6 weeks and have not seen him since I moved out last november. I don't want him to think this is a form of pursuit (I have always been the pursuer and fix-it)


Thanks...

[tonibertha]

meant approx $50

[MrBond]

Just tell him to drop the mail off to you or arrange to have it sent somewhere. You don't necessarily have to be there in person.

Actually if you haven't seen him in awhile, then maybe you should let him see how good you look now. You're going to have to have him see you some time.

[tonibertha]

Thanks MrB, thinking an email saying 'hi, pls i need the mail you've been keeping for me, how do i get it?'

[tonibertha]

Still haven't sent that email to H (hoping he will contact me first, and then i can reply with that email). I'm not sure why i'm hesitant. I really do need the documents, but i want to be sure i'm sending it for the right reason, and not just to have some contact with him.

It's been 6 weeks since we had any contact, and i'm missing him so much i can barely think. i'm desperate for some contact, but i want to make sure that this does not come across in my email. not sure how to effect that...

[MrBond]

No, you set the terms of how you get it.

How about..."'hi, pls i need the mail you've been keeping for me, I have a lunch date on Wednesday and I can pick it up on the way. Thanks.'

Of course, "date" doesn't have to refer to an actual "date". Just an appointment.

[tonibertha]

Thanks, MrB.

I sent the email this morning before i saw your post. This is how it went:

Me: Hi, Please i need the mail you've been keeping for me (that impt document i mentioned before). Can we arrange for me to get them? Also, how do i get the iphone to you? (he got my iPhone for me, but refused to claim the insurance when it broke, so i got a new one and now need to return the one i'm not using)

H: Hi, we can do that but we will also need 2 meet up soon please

Thinking of replying something like 'when did you have in mind' or 'we can meet up to swap the stuff'.

What do you think?

[MrBond]

No you have to be the one to say when things are convenient for YOU. Don't leave it up to him. Be decisive. Tell him the day, time and where. Again, you have to show that YOU have a busy life and can't have him drag you down.