I think it's a good thing in that it shows him he can't just sit in the status quo forever. Setting boundaries, like not letting him talk to you about his R with OW, is good. It's also scary to me, the way he talks - he really sounds suicidally depressed and desperate. I'd definitely tslk to his psychiatrist about his meds. Also, please monitor how he's taking them - I'm convinced that the reason suicide rates go up in adolescents and young adults on anti-depressants, is because they miss doses. My daughter used to get totally whacked when she skipped even one or two days when she was on Prozac for her eating disorder.
The best thing would be if the two of you could meet with a good marriage counselor - that would cut through your H's denial and excuses I think. But I believe you said he couldn't go through the military for that because he'd get in trouble for having the affair - is that right? Seems counterproductive to me. Is there any way you could afford to see a private marriage counselor?
