This trip has got me all torn up. Part of me doesn't want to go anymore. I think I set myself up for failure.
I just want it over right now, which is not good. I want to have the talk and get it over.
When we get back, I think I am going to have to just go dim and stop doing anything with the W. I am getting too attached and I don't think she has moved at all.
Back to day one for me. All my progress is lost.
Half of me still thinks the trip will be a good thing. But the other half thinks the end result will be nothing.
I know a lot of people gave me advice which I did not listen to. I got myself into this mess. I am asking how I can recover after this trip so I don't have to go back to the beginning.
I am just in a bad place today.
M-40 W-33 D3, D4, SD13 T 9 YEARS M 5 YEARS ILYBINILWY APRIL 2012
