H is still depressed but today said it's not me. That's one thing he is sure of. He said I am a the one good thing in this.
From what you have revealed of H, he seems pretty logically/rationally oriented. Because I am a science/engineer type, I am guessing that for now he has eliminated you and the M as a cause of his unhappiness, because YOU changed, showed him things could be different. So he is in a depression, and trying to figure out WHAT is the cause of his unhappiness, since it isn't the M. You have to keep to your changes to keep the M out of the list as much as possible (yes, it might go back to the list of causes, but make sure YOU don't help him put it back there!).
This is a delicate time, Rachael.
I know from personal experience that pushing him, or backsliding on your changes can help him dive back into the tunnel. When W seemed to be over phase 1 and the affair, I pushed her to get things back to "normal" and restart living again...AND I backslid...result...phase 2 of her mlc, with a vengeance! Might it have happened anyway? Sure. As bad? Maybe. Do I want to be responsible for pushing her back into the tunnel a third time? Heck no!
Stay backed off, do as 25 said, get mo' GAL. Let him find his own answers, in his own time, and catch up with you. Do not push right now, at all!
Be the lighthouse!
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
