You all know I was kidding about the flat stomach, right? I may have forgotten to use the sarcasm font.....
I ran into a sailing friend out on the water, of all places. I let her try my board. So she and her daughter went out together. (Trying out other peoples boards is part of the brotherhood of surfing. As is always waving to each other when we are transporting our boards around on our vehicles.)
A super hot guy on a bike with a surfboard on a rack threw me a shakka as I was driving home. And smiled a beautiful smile at me. Life is good!
I'm sitting here with my granddaughters, I just made a cake for the girl whose birthday party was yesterday. Someone brought two cake mixes and one tub of frosting and left it on my washer. So I made a big choc/white sprinkle swirl cake for her. Since the party went all night there are still 5 extra friends here. I just told my son that they are not all spending the night again. So after they eat their cake they all need to start making their ways home..... You know: You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here!
One of the things I'm changing about me is not letting everyone walk all over me. My S22 kinda argued with me when I told him they all need to head out soon. But if he wants to have a bunch of people hanging around at all hours he needs to get a great job so he can afford them.
My STBXH never would back me up before and we actually had several people crashing here with S22 for years. My bills have gone down dramatically since they all cleared out. I have enough stress in my life without squatters. The studio apartment my S22 lives in has a seperate entrance and is up one level from the main level of our house, in case anyone wonders.
Anyway, I don't know where S22 will live when this D goes thru and this house sells. I am actually thinking maybe he can live with his dad. Maybe they can grow up together. (Sarcasm font)
I do see myself as a major enabler and am tired of that role. I have been taking steps with S22 to get him more independent of us money wise. Explaining to him that everything is changing. Then last week he walked off his job in anger. And was being very unreasonable to me.
He showed up with a new girlfriend. Who is a bit chunky and evidently doesn't like to miss any meals. Suddenly he was grumping to me about wanting money for food, wanting to cook fancy meals for her. And he got mad because I wouldn't give him money, and/or drop everything I was doing to run and buy him food.
My cupboards are over runnibng with food. I swear we could eat for a month if we just ate what was in the house. So I told him that. And he gives me attitude. I have raised a spoiled brat. Then his new girlfriend got in trouble with her parents for spending the night here. I would have sworn it was 3 days and 2 nights, but who is counting? She is also 22 and has a bachelors in psychology. She is unemployed.
Anyway, I have been hiding, reading, but not posting wondering exactly how to deal with all this. Last night at my meditation class the lama said to talk less and listen more. I just talked a lot here. And I am ready, willing, and able to listen to any of you with feedback on this.
I was reading a study about how troubled marriages often have troubled kids. And it is a chicken and egg kind of thing. As in it isn't clear which came first!
Okay, the girls woke up from their naps, time to play!
Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32 D final 9/12 Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!
