First, don't assume that you just drop the rope and you will be emotionally fine. It COULD be true, although it's certainly likely that those emotions will roll a few more times for you...
Second, I'm going to point at the following statement you posted:
Originally Posted By: jamiegarcia333
I have no desire to act in anger in any way. I don't have the desire to see or speak to him either. I'm just done, ready to move on.
The bold part...
Why not?
Because here's the thing...
If you don't "feel" anything... no animosity towards him...
Why would you not want to speak to him or see him?
Because truth be known... I've spent a LOT of time trying to convince myself that I didn't care... yet would not speak to my W... did not want to see her...
Because I was angry at her...
I've been working on being friends with my W, now...
Because I don't care...
I do know that my D9 cares... and she likes that we are being "friendly"... and I think my D14 does too, but she'd never admit it...
I know you don't have kids, so there's no motivation...
I have three very good female friends who I KNOW have my back... Yet, I had dated and been intimate with these woman back in my late teens / early twenties. And the break ups weren't necessary happy and mutual...
They liked me, I liked them... as people... as friends... and the Rs may have not worked, but ultimately, we still like each other... and can be friends... no problem seeing each other and talking to each other... do it often... like daily... bff's... without the benefits...
There are things about my W that drive me crazy... and I'm pleased as punch that I don't have to deal with them every day, now... I can imagine meeting her on the street and chatting... talking with her at parties... maybe even going for coffee... with her and her new H... or bf...
So I'm working on that... 'cause I really think that's OK... because at the end of the day... I ain't going home with her... and I'm not gonna M her...
Like you, though...
My W still has different plans...
She SAYS there's "no reason to be angry and bitter with each other"... says that she is "pleased that we can get along with each other for the sake of the kids" (emphasis mine, and I do so because it certainly DOES emphasise that's the only reason) and also stating some boundaries about HER friends and MY friends, as though never the two shall meet... or maybe more specifically, that her friends are off limit to me...
I'm doing a bit of speculation and mind reading, of course... or even elaborating a bit...
What I'm saying there is... it is very clear, she wants nothing to do with me...
And I'm guessing... that's anger speaking...
If we don't want to see someone or speak with them... that means there's probably something there...
I am slowly socking the money away that I need to file D.
But... like these ex-GFs that I am really good friends with... I say... why not...?
