go have fun in paris - and just take care of yourself.
believe nothing of what they say and half of what they do. and it's not done until it's done. the was's throw stuff out all the time, and being on their roller coaster is about getting caught up in it every time they do throw it out.
they might do what they say and they might not. my h threw that out to me 3 months ago and i was sure he'd do it the next day. but if i depend on whether he does it or not - then i allow him to keep me in a bad place constantly. he may do it, he may not - but what am i going to do in the mean time, right?
either have fun and live the best i can, or be completely crushed while i wait? choose the former for yourself.
detaching is about not getting caught up in what they say or do - to get on with our lives and just make the effort everyday to find things within ourselves that empower us and keep us in as good a place as possible. that's not to say we won't have bad moments, they will come up, but we will have good moment too.
don't think about the future too much, just focus on the days ahead of you and on enjoin your trip.
and while you're there, if you have to think about your sitch, change your focus on it to a different perspective and start thinking about what are the things you could do in a positive way towards your h. find the 180 within yourself that can upend him a bit. he will expect that you will be more and more miserable after this - but if you are more relaxed and happier and not showing him that this affects you the way he expects it's going to - that will put a little salt in his porridge! he is depending on you to be miserable to keep doing what he's doing. if you start being happy - that will foil his plans, right?
so hugs again and have a great trip. come here if you need support
zig
me 46 H 38 M10yrs T 11 S10 BD ow 8/11 h filed 9/25/12
"if i could define enlightenment briefly, i would say it is the quiet acceptance of what is"
