Hi Zig - thanks for checking on me smile still a little under the weather but the tiniest bit better. Summer colds are the worst!

I will definitely have to ponder other ways to fill my tank that don't include H. In a prior thread I noticed that I was sort of showing things off to people in an effort to fill my WOA tank. Geez, how desperate does that sound? Do I primarily do acts of service for others to get WOA? Hmmm... Are any of my tanks full?? Yikes!

It is nice to be around family. I think my cat sort of recognizes me. He can be a real jerk but I've been practicing not projecting his actions of being a jerk onto me and instead trying to lovingly respond or explain his actions. Small steps but it is good practice in not reacting negatively to what other people do, I guess.

I'm still trying to get this blanket done. It's getting there. I also slept for 9+ hours last night for the first time in a long time.

While I'm home I'm thinking of going mattress shopping. My current bed is nearly as old as my R with H and he's much larger than me so there's a rut where he slept. A new mattress would be a nice fresh start for me (and probably good for my back!!). I had some anxiety because then I thought - do I need a whole new bed frame (b/c some beds don't need box springs)? That's a lot of pressure to figure out a bed AND a mattress right now... Then I realized, I already have a box spring, I can just get the mattress now and decide on the bed later. This sounds silly but it's a real behavior pattern for me to have things spiral out of control in my head and then feel hopeless about a solution. Now I feel more confident about the mattress decision and I'll be able to handle it all no problem.

I was also thinking about test driving some cars while I'm here. That might be a fun activity to do with my dad. It's always tough to get him out of the house to do anything but he's fairly knowledgeable about cars and I could use his advice. I'm 31 and I've never owned a car before. shocked I know, I know.


A few things of note -
-I'd previously asked H if he would mind watering my plants while I was gone. He said no problem. Then I mentioned I had a co-worker coming over to water the plants (and meant that it was while he would be gone but didn't say it). He almost looked really angry and said "I said *I* could do it!!" I said, well you're going to be out of town, when? He said X, and I said right, she's coming the 2 days after you leave. He had that same look on his face that he did after I suggested he move his clothing out of my bedroom and responded "Oh."

-H helped me carry out a suitcase to the taxi yesterday morning as I was leaving. He wished me a nice trip. I just said "bye."

-I had forgotten to pay a bill and grab something I needed before I left. I texted H yesterday at 930 AM about it (knowing he'd still be home), asking him to pay the bill (it's due before I get back) and to send me a picture of the other thing if he could. Silly me had the expectation that he'd get on it as he's been so seemingly eager to offer help recently. He didn't reply until around 6pm, saying he could do that but he wouldn't be back until the end of the night if that was okay. I didn't respond. He finally texted me the picture at 5AM this morning with "Hope it's not too late." ... Really? Back to this again, it seems. That said, I don't know if he took today off or if he just got up early to work or go to the gym, so, maybe I jumped to a conclusion with my initial reaction. I haven't responded yet.

Got some things planned with my folks and I'm still working on this blanket. Down to the wire!