Swimming with certain Turtles

[zig]

h called a bit ago to say that he was going to join a bunch of our friends - the ones i hang out with - to watch the cracker show.

didn't ask for me to come along - just repeated several times - i'm just calling to tell you that's what we're doing.

i'm taking it as he'd like me to be there, just can't ask!!

casually tried to say that parking would be a bitch, hoping he'd offer to pick me up, but he wasn't biting - went on about how i could park far away and would have to walk - i said no problem

i asked what he was doing for dinner (s is with friends who are bringing him downtown) and he quickly replied that he was cooking for grandparents. good - i'm glad to hear that - he's been staying there while parents are on their trip and spending a lot of time with them - in fact, i think cooking dinner for them almost every night. he had withdrawn completely from them from aug. to about march, and i think they are so pleased that he's "back" again. they are the people that he wasn't able to face the most after the bomb drop - couldn't even speak to them, and since they don't know anything, they were devastated.

so i'm going to go down there with my little whiskey flask and hang out with friends and kids - first time after the accident that i can handle the crackers - noise and light - so am pretty excited - always loved the cracker show before and loved taking s

i'm not so sad now - feeling a lot better - i think just posting here and letting it out a bit helped a lot - not to mention 2 one hour sessions of meditation

I am where I am , and it's okay...

zig

ps. heck it's more than okay - i'm good!