A whole 6 hours last night! Still dead tired. I think I've realised why I'm fighting so against all the good advice do much. It's to do with self worth. I've always hated being single and end up doing things to keep busy rather than actually enjoying them. If I'm not busy then the fear can say things like "everyone welder is having fun, why can't you?". My wife helped me overcome that because having her around gave me the confidence to ignore it. She told me in Saturday that she is having the same problem. She is facing it by convincing herself to be single, focussing on her job, and forcing herself to bee buddy all the time. She is facing her worries by rejecting me, which in turn feeds my fear that says, "see everything else is more interesting than you. You have to so something to stop her seeing that". It probably led to me being a bit to possessive as a partner and is making me fight against good advice now. I don't want to give in and be single. I married a wonderful, if flawed, woman and want to keep it that way. The best way to do that just seems so wrong though!
