LITB-- I am so happy for you and your family. Really, I have tears in my eyes just thinking about it and how happy your children will...what a beautiful beautiful thing to give them.
Have a wonderful ten days.
I will be thinking and praying for you. And thank you for all you have done for me and us all.
((( ))) Busting
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
You stated later in your situation that you had begun dating someone else. How was that for you?
It was great at the beginning, because it was nice to have someone’s full and complete attention. Unfortunately or fortunately depending how you look at it, that full and complete attention required me to reciprocate it. It was more than I was willing to give at that point. I broke it off and hurt someone. It certainly wasn’t my intention. One of my regrets.
Originally Posted By: Crimson
How did it make you feel about yourself and your situation?
When the dating began, I felt that my M was over and I was going to live my life with what I knew. I was a single man. Believe me, my intent was not to get my W back.
Originally Posted By: Crimson
How did your W take it (I recall she was happy for you initially, but did that change?).
Her demeanor did change. When I dropped our children off with her and she knew that I was going to be spending time with my GF, she gave me the cold shoulder.
I didn’t care. It wasn’t my problem. I wasn’t going to stop living.
If you are asking if me dating played a role in our reconciliation, I would say to a small degree it did.
The FB thing turned out to be a bit of a fiasco. My W didn’t like it and doesn’t like it to this day. The thing is that she had absolutely no input on how I was living. I reminded her of that when she called me upset about it.
Originally Posted By: Crimson
2.) There was a pretty long period of time when you dropped off the boards for a bit. It would appear a lot of things were going on at that point. How were you spending that time? Did you interact much with your w then? What was the R like?
I was just living. I wasn’t thinking about my sitch or M anymore.
We interacted very little. When we did, it was positive and about our children. She admitted that she had gone “businesslike” on me for awhile. It didn’t even register with me, because my life and my happiness was no longer dependent on her.
One thing that I haven’t mentioned is that her R with OM (her HS sweetheart) wasn’t going well. He was still the spineless D-Bag that he was in his younger days. So when I began dating, reality was setting in for her.
Ask away. I don’t mind answering Crimson.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
I completely understand, LITB. It took me a long time before I could talk about my sitch, and it's STILL painful to go back and read my journal for that period, and it's been 5 years now.
Enjoy your visit; I'll be praying that it is everything you hope it will be, and that you guys will continue to make real progress.
Starsky
Starsky,
As always, I appreciate your support and prayers more than words can express.
I hope you are doing well.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
LITB-- I am so happy for you and your family. Really, I have tears in my eyes just thinking about it and how happy your children will...what a beautiful beautiful thing to give them.
Have a wonderful ten days.
I will be thinking and praying for you. And thank you for all you have done for me and us all.
((( ))) Busting
Thanks Busting. I am glad to help you however I can.
I will continue to follow your sitch and offer support.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
On this past Thursday evening I picked my W up at the airport for her visit. Her flight arrived a bit early, so she was already in baggage claim when I got there. The whole thing felt surreal.
I walked straight up to her and took her into my arms with a big hug and kiss. We held hands the entire time while waiting for her luggage. It felt like familiar, but new. I’ll leave most of the other mushy stuff out.
While we were laying in bed talking that night, she looked straight into my eyes with tears in hers and said, “I am sorry for all the hurt that I caused you. I know you were going thru so much.” (I had lost my dad earlier in 2010 in addition to some other big changes.)
Friday morning before leaving the hotel, my W asked me a question that I answered honestly, but without putting any thought into it. It pertained to my ex-gf and she got upset. She hung her lip for awhile until we talked about it and I apologized for not putting any thought into my answer. It turned out to be a healthy opportunity for us to learn and get a couple of things off of our chests.
On Friday afternoon, we picked up our children and took them to lunch to break the news to them. When we told them, our D9 raised both hands in the air and said, “YAY!!” Then proceeded to ask questions about where we will be living, school, etc. Nonetheless, it was a classic moment for us.
We went to the movies after lunch and then we went to the north part of the Golden Gate Bridge where I put my W’s wedding ring back on her finger. It is so good to look at her hand and she that ring there.
Thus far everything has gone really well, besides my silly answer to her question on Friday.
That’s the gist of it.
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
I can well imagine how it must be to see that ring there! Very cool!
Me: 36 Her: 35 Together 7/09 Married 8/7/10 Separate rooms since at least April 11 "I've decided I want a divorce" 12/5/11 She moves out of state/files 2/7/12 Dissolution final 5/12
Nice work, LITB! I'm really happy to see your story unfolding in such a positive way. Keep moving forward. Good things are in store for you and your family!
Me51 W53 S17 S14 M22 T25 Bomb-9/11; A-11/11; I move out 11/11
It's easy to find our bottom, it is our top that requires cultivation.
Every rough spot adds to our emotional constitution. -Barney Fife
LITB I am so happy for you and your family! So excited as well. You seemed to have worked through the honest, yet blunt answer quite well and that's a good thing. I can only imagine how your children's hearts must have lifted with the news. Wow.
Sorry about the loss of your father. How you managed to come through so much at one time is so inspiring.
And thank you thank you for continuing to follow me and offer your support. It makes me feel like I can do this.
Have a great day ((( )))
TPS Me: 44 H: 42 M14 T17 S10 D7 10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month 21/04/12 H is 'DONE' 04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010) July '14 H ends affair May '15 H moves back home
