This is not looking good! (Long post...)

[Accuray]

If you read Brit's story it may be instructive -- she was in your wife's position and left her H. Whether H read DB or not I don't know, but he dropped the rope, acted as if, and got on with his life -- in terms of what he "presented" to her. ONLY when he did that was Brit able to step back and reconsider what she was doing. Now, she really wants him back!

He told her at one point that he cried for a whole month, but she didn't see that, he didn't show her. The psychological effect here is ironic, the more you walk away, the stronger your pull.

Everything about you, your heart and soul will say "NO, THAT WILL NEVER WORK", and consequently you pursue, and you prolong your wife's retreating and push out the starting line for recovery even farther. Each day you spend pursuing her is one more day you'll need to wait to get her back. Look at it that way.

You're fighting this, and that's normal. You're getting very consistent advice here from many of us, but your response is the same -- "no that won't work for me, W will forget about me, W needs me to show I love her, W just needs to hear me out and understand how I feel."

I've given you one verifiable example of where giving space has worked -- Brit. Spend some time trying to find one instance where pursuit has worked -- just try to find a single one. That exercise may help convince you that there is really only one way to go if you want to reconcile.

Accuray