Well for you two to work on the marriage. OM has to be completely out of the picture and that would include the mother.

But you two are no where near there to come up with decision. As it will just come across as controlling or an ultimatum.

Something to stow away for now.

You can only truly say it when she is remorseful and is working to get back your trust in her. As it will be more understood then.

Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul.
unconditional love is awesome!