I just read your thread and it touches me. I feel so much the same in many ways. I am quite new here, too, but I didn't write a lot, due to a writing aversion...
I read in your post that you can't do much about the cleaning situation. Now I don't know why, but I know that in my relationship this was one of the big problems. And I still feel I am unable to do something about it. I live in a horrible chaos because I just get paralized looking at it. Luckily (in this case) my husband is not here. He left us to be in Peru again, so he doesn't see it. But if I would ask him he would say I am a slot and I am just too lazy. But it's not true and I feel very misunderstood. I just can't do it alone. I am a person who needs someone around so I can function with daily things.. And I am trying since thirty years to be more tidy. I tried to explain him but he never understood and also he didn't want me to get help and when I did he was angry. So my big question is: What to do if I cannot change what my spouse dislikes? I mean, I am who I am, or not?
I would love to hear from others...
And I wish you, Sophiedaphne, all the strength and wisdom and love you need in this hard trip!
