DB Bootcamp - Vets and Newbies

[Alliekat]

Im new and would love to do boot camp. What do i need to do??

[zig]

So sorry to hear that sg.
Be well
(( )))

zig

[sayitaintso]

Sorry to hear sg

[vera be fierce]

sg I am so sorry to hear about your loss. Losing a beloved pet is never easy.

If any vets are still checking this thread, I thought I'd throw my hat in...

H has filed for D and served me, we are now in our cooling off period before anything can be made final. No kids. He wants to be best friends (wants to go out to eat together, cook together, he still folds my laundry/hangs up delicates) and has noticed that I've been pulling back, saying that he has fun when we hang out and he really wants us to be able to do that. I've had a few sessions with Cheryl and we're at a loss as to what would be a sign that H is reconsidering short of him saying that he is putting the brakes on the D. H's complaints in the M were that, although things were comfortable and improving (we'd been in MC for a long time), he needed more spontenaiety and adventure. I had been working on those things prior to BD with him. I think he has possible EA but no confirmation of that right now. He is not yet 30 but in some ways is acting like MLC and trying to relive his adolescence/college party life. I'm not really interested in being his friend if we are D as I don't really like some of the people he associates with now and I'm not keen on his activities.

I would like some help keeping the focus on myself. I've been working on some fitness goals and GAL a lot (and had been well before BD as I'd recovered from a long-term illness). I feel better than I have in years. But now we are moving toward selling the house and it's hitting me really hard. I also work in the legal profession so the symbolism of D is very salient to me.

So I guess it would be helpful if anyone has experience dealing with possible MLC at a fairly young age.

[sgctxok]

I'd like to use a coach for DB'ing but our recent finacial trouble I've discovered since W told me she wants to seperate hasn't enought for phone coaching.
I'm currently still looking to move out and not support her, but my credit score is making rental really expensive. Plus I have about 25 years worth the stuff to get rid of and sell.
S7 is starting to show signs of distrust in us and the S12 is playing tough for now.
Today I've got no hope for this marriage have become very disgusted with what the W has done to our (almost) 25 years of M.
I'm almost done........

Hi Mr. D --


How can we assist you, what do you feel you need?

[sgctxok]

Mr. D, zig, sayitaintso, verab -

Thank you so much for your kindness. I've never grieved a pet before, and I'm really surprised by it.

Thanks for your understanding.

[bkbond]

Hi everyone... I was on this site back in 2009.. 3 years later I am back. As I sit here and read your stories I feel I am a bit out of the norm. While I know my husband is unhappy and if it wasn't for our 4 year old he would be gone, but he isn't gone. But it really isn't anything more than a roommate situation. We don't really fight but that is because we don't really talk. When I do talk it gets taken the wrong way or I say it in a snotty way because he frustrates me. I what a marriage filled with love not just what it is. I would love to talk with one of you to see how I can prevent it from getting to the "I can't take it any more he left" stage. I am not sure what I should do to bring the love back into the marriage and the communication that can be done in a pleasant way.

[MrBond]

bkbond,

How about restarting your own thread where you can further elaborate your story? That would help alot.

[lillystillinlove]

I'm new to posting at this site but have done a lot of reading on various techniques to save a marriage but this one, by far, seem to be the best option for my situation.

I've read DR and I've been working my way through this message board and have gathered a lot of good information. I have done a lot of the self work stuff prior to finding the book. But, I'm having trouble with interaction with my H in stressful situations, it's really hard for me to contain myself, my anger and disappointment. I am losing ground with my H toward reconciliation and now we are at the point of him moving out at the end of the month. He needs space and time (found out move date 7/9)

Here are some basics Me:43, H:49, S:6, T:17 M:16, Bomb:1/27/12 a little more than an EA, pretty confident she is out of the picture but...

He's moving out the end of 7/12, not yet asking for a D but I suspect it's coming, he's been walking me down this path very slowly. a pretty I have lengthy write up of our situation but I'm not sure what the policy in on that.

Hoping for help
Thank you
Lillystillinlove

[labug]

lilly, you will get responses if you start your own thread. At the top of the Newcomers board there is a New Topic button, click it and a text box will open.

Good luck.