Hey Purg!

California is where many of my friends live. I graduated from high school with a tight knit group of military brats and small town farm kids. I have run the reunions from afar and have maintained friendships.

That said, I LOVE it here in Hawaii. But keep doing the spreadsheet and for 1/4 the money I can have twice the house and 10 times the land size. Cost of living is high in California. But SKY High here in Hawaii.

I found a decent house here, but then my kids weighed in and all just want to leave Hawaii. Back to the spreadsheet. I can visit Hawaii twice a year and still have money in the bank. Of course that is all WHEN and IF the house sells.......

I have been working hard to keep OW out of my head. I'm pretty sure she reads along on here, after hacking my computer last year. I choose to keep the same screen name and not worry about it, because even if I changed to a different name, she knows me well enough to figure out who I am.

And if it all wasn't her, then I am just paranoid. But what I get from all the wise people here is worth more than what I might be losing by OW snooping on me.

When I am out walking I visualize myself walking away from STBXH. And my hate for people who have hurt me serves no purpose. I do my best to just let it go. Sometimes when I am walking I visualize the wind blowing it off me and it evaporating out into the world, like a cloud of steam just evaporating and gone.....

I was reading about seeking validation. And how it just is backwards thinking. Kind of along my running our lives by committee train of thought. We seek validation when we are seeking objectivity. Very hard for our friends and family to provide that. (Perfect strangers on the internet, can, though!)

Purg, did you ever read any of the baggagereclaim blogs? Those helped me a lot. And the gal who writes them uses British humor, which is guarenteed to make you smile. (Like when she ponders men who think the sun shines out of their bums, see you just smiled!)

Aloha,

Wendy


Me 57 XH 58 Sons age 32 & 27 M:32
D final 9/12
Bought 10 Acres and Living the Dream!