Thank you everyone for the info and the continued encouragement, Lord knows I need plenty of both!
I got home tonight, a few minutes ago, and he's parked in the front yard again, this time in a different spot closer to the door... wondering if he unloaded something large.... who knows. I just checked my e-mail and he forwarded me the e-mail confirming the phone bill payment, and just typed thank you. Strange.... do I respond to that???? WTF?
Whenever your MLCer does something good/right/nice, such as paying the phone bill, a simple 'thank you' is in order.
He sent that to you most likely because he wanted you to see that he is doing the right thing and a thank you to him acknowledges that you're not taking it for granted.
Reward the good behavior, detach from the crap stuff. Taking the high road is hard, but can be done.
seeking answers~ I just re-read what I had typed, I don't think I was clear (sorry it was late).... I had paid the phone bill, he gets the notification e-mail because that's the e-mail addressed attached to the account, he forwarded it to me and typed thank you to me for paying the bill. I have been paying that bill for months and sometimes he will verbally tell me thank you, but he's never forwarded me the e-mail and thanked me. It was just strange (of course what isn't anymore). Again, sorry for not being clear earlier. Also I really appreciate the comments and advice, thank you. It's kind of like dealing with a toddler, continually praise the good and ignore the bad (unless of course it's a safety issue- in the case of toddlers anyhow).
I have a headache.... and for the last week or so I have been feeling it.... that tug, you know the one, depression... it's a sneaky little bastard, but I'm thinking it's part of the reason I"m tired all the time and don't want to do much these days. Had counseling tonight, he agrees. He said as hard as it is I need to keep GAL.... I know that, but some days I just want to sleep....
Yesterday had yet another strange encounter with my alien.... which is probably why he's not home right after work tonight (plus he's increased talking to mommy again, that's never good). Yesterday evening I was minding my own business, laying on "my" bed watching tv and playing scramble with friends on my phone, when who should appear.... yep, H. He wanted attention. He told me he tries really hard to resist me, I asked him why he thought he needed to resist me, he said because it's not right, and then he said I wear what I wear to get his attention. I said, no I wear what I wear because I've lost weight and feel better about myself again. I'm not sure if he realized that he said this next part, maybe he was having a clear moment, he said something to the effect of, "You don't notice me walking back and forth trying to see what you are doing?" I said no. Honestly, I have noticed, not just last night, but other times, he will go back to "his" room, what seems like an excessive amount of times,be there a few seconds to a few minutes, and then go back to watching tv. I just chalked it up to confused, jumpy mind. But apparently he's trying to see what I'm doing.... I thought that was interesting. Who knows, again, done trying to figure out crazy... makes my head hurt! :crazy
I am really, really glad you noticed your symptoms and checked in with your C...we have to watch the effect of all the roller coasters of emotions our sitches and life itself these days throw at us...Are you on meds? I am not a big fan of pharms in general, I have taken St. John's Wort in the past to take the edge off without turning off the empathy chip.
I wish I had something concrete to say about your alien visitation, but I don't...peeking out of the tunnel? touch-n-go? checking that you're still around? dipping his toe in the water? what he accidentally revealed, and his actions, MIGHT mean that he is afraid of losing you, that he is conflicted because he wants to do the right thing, but not sure what form that will take. He definitely is NOT sure of what he wants, and maybe he is pushing you away to try to minimize your pain, to keep you "clean", protected somewhat, from whatever he is going through...if that makes ANY sense what so ever. Maybe sort of like when someone chooses to have their beloved hate them, rather than drag them into the muck they are heading into...lots of great stories through history on that theme...And also I could be completely wrong...just speculation.
Big hug, hang in there, keep your valuable sense of humor firing on all cylinders... !!
T^2
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
