Hi sgctxok,

I saw your post on my thread regarding the mentor program, I'm very flattered! Here's how I feel about it -- I'm already contributing the best way I think I can. In some cases I've tried to help people and just didn't click, so I can just slowly ease away because so many others are willing to pick it up.

In other cases, I can take people up to a certain point, but beyond that I feel I offer limited value. There are a lot of people whose sitch's were much worse than mine, had it go on for much longer, etc. I feel hypocritical offering them advice because I didn't walk that walk, if you know what I mean. I'll often find that once I get to a certain point a more experienced vet will come in and pick it up.

Finally, I don't really have any formal training. I like the fact that "all posters are created equal", because if I'm off base, others can correct me and there's nothing special about my status that suggests my posting should carry more weight.

For me DB was pretty great without the formal mentors, and I'm very happy to keep contributing (and getting help myself), but being formally paired isn't something I'm looking for right now. I end up helping on the threads where I really think I can help -- and that may not be the one I end up getting paired with.

I'd feel better about it if there was some kind of test, certification, or other hurdle to ensure that what I say and think really IS consistent with the advice you want given.

Thanks for a great site!

Accuray


Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced
M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11
Start Reconcile: 8/15/11
Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced)
In a New Relationship: 3/2015