so defeated and scared silly

[breakdownbill]

Hey SS

I can totally relate to the below

H has not invited me to any functions with his family. i would feel so uncomfortable at this graduation.

what do i say if he asks again? i don't want to say anything that sounds like blame or resentment.

I'm graduating next month & I've invited my W and 2 kids plus my Mum & Dad. Now when I mentioned this to my W she rolled her eyes & huffed.

I found out that I got a 1st in my degree yesterday, all my friends have been spoilt by their parents or loved ones. I got one card, from the sister who I don't get on with.

I know my W shouldn't be happy about playing happy families, even for a day, but this Graduation next month is a big deal for me & I really hope she just deals with these resentments for 1 day & not spoil it.

I think what your H said here is interesting.

No matter what happens I wanted you to know that I would like you to be there if possible ( of course only if you do).

This is a big day for him as a dad & he wants to share it with the people who mean the most to him, despite the situation.

It's a bit like when you have an extreme situation for worse, say for instance (and I am not wishing this on anyone) your H was seriously ill, I'm sure he'd want you there despite the situation.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, when it comes down to it, when it's a really big moment or occassion, you just need to share it with the people that count in your life, no matter how bad things are, otherwise the moment will pass you by.

I'm not saying that this is an olive branch from your H, but it clearly means a lot to him that you are there to share this moment with him.

My advice would be to give it some thought, before you decide either way.

Bill