All that stuff about feeling numb. Forget it, I absolutely broke down on the way home. So full of guilt for some of the stupid things I did. I've apologised for them but probably too little, too late. I just feel so full of remorse that it hurts. Yes, she left but I had a massive role in it. The final electric/gas bill which she owes money on was waiting for me at home too. So I do have a legitimate reason to ring but I'm not sure it would be a good idea now. I really want to talk to her now but I know I would just end up apologising over and over. I'm a complete mess...
