I'm sure you have a good handle on things, but a woman who will accuse you of this will probably stop at nothing. Sadly this tactic has a common name SAID, Sexual Allegations in Divorce. One man, who ultimately sued his ex-wife and won $850K in a defamation suit, was accused NINE separate times. He also was awarded full custody.
So really it's more than a he said, she said. You really need to look at it like that. She has for all intents and purpose accused you of a CRIME. You are still giving her the benefit of the doubt. It's clear she still has some sway over you, I mean why are you even talking about if she has a "change of heart." Look what she has accused you of (and she accused you). If my W ever pulled that stuff, I would never want to be with someone like that.
I worry in you effort to be Christ-like you will admit to too much stuff. Back off too much. This isn't really about that. I think you are using your religion as an excuse.
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. --Jean Jacques Rousseau.
