DB Bootcamp - Vets and Newbies

[~ kd ~]

And to add to that, what might be the possibilities of a coach helping to coach the vet to coach the newbie?

Because we know the mantra here:
"The ONLY experts of DB are Michelle and the coaches."

Vets and all members are otherwise here to support and get support. Nothing more, nothing less.

[~ kd ~]

Alternatively, perhaps a coach to coach the mods to help coach the vets to coach the newbies?

and/or

a place for vets to place themselves in a volunteer role and a coach can make a request from a vet to support a newbie as the coach may feel the vet has the appropriate DB skillset to support the newbie.

[zig]

KD - i love your suggestions - and i'm so glad that this is being considered.

i really hope that this gets going. sadly every few weeks i notice how many more people get on this board with their painful stories. not to mention how many there already are and how long so many have been at it.

if the coaches would agree - that would be phenomenal.

sort of taking it to the next step.

zig

[jks]

I know I have always hoped for some advice from 25 directly aimed towards my sitch. Hoping to get a chance here??

H has been in a PA since January with a long time co-worker of 6 years who he feels like he's "in love" with. He's openly stated to me that he knows he's messed up and his family means more to him than anything else but he just can't seem to let her go because he still feels so strongly for her.

He's still very cordial and nice to me and I only contact him for business matters only regarding our home and children. He openly spends all of his time with OW and she is invited to all family events and is around my kids whenever H has them. My kids just recently expressed to me that they have seen them kiss and it makes them sad.

So, he is allowing OW to become closer to my children and his family and no one seems to see anything wrong with this. He says he doesn't have it in him to file for D. He thinks there is still hope for us.

Advice? Sorry this might have been too much.

[cat04]

Jks,

That isn't too much. While many vets don't like being requested by name, there is no reason why that shouldn't happen if you really wish to hear someone's opinion.

Most of us will say the same basic things but sometimes the delivery is different and maybe more effective.

While this idea isn't bad, I thought that was exactly what the boards were for. People post their stories and if someone feels that they can help, they respond...

Curious to see what unfolds.

[labug]

I agree cat, I thought that's what happened on the boards.

People respond to posts because they feel a connection, not because they have to.

A variety of responders is the best scenario because you never know what might be the one thing that makes sense to the reader. It's also helpful to others reading not just the author of the thread.

As for specific "vets"---when people are on moderation I advise them to dig into the archives, they are a treasure trove of information. I found folks whose words spoke to me and then dug for old posts of theirs. The situations we each find ourselves in are not that different. A lot of the advice holds true across the board. Yes, this is a personal journey but we all share characteristics (how many of us are controlling/fixer/perfectionists? raise your hands) and can learn from the same advice, even if it is 5 years old.

Trying new things is good, tho. We don't learn and grow without change.

[sgctxok]

I get this and support it. My only query or concern is when the LBSer does not know what they need.

I think I understand what you're saying, 25, but generally,

- most newbies know where they want to go, and know something of what they need and that's where to begin

- this is about 2 folks pairing up in a mentor/mentee relationship, not about someone being told what to do or what they need, it's about drawing it out of someone

- some folks really want to be told, and they will say so, and seek out that kind of advice

[sgctxok]

So I SUGGEST - that the thread is started with Bootcamp in the name, so basically mostly only the mentor and mentee post there. The conversation will be focused. I think it should be

"Bootcamp with XXX" XX being the vet (because the thread is started by the mentee or bootcamper)


So we can either keep these on Newcomers or move them over to the KLA forum. What do you think?

[sgctxok]

Suggested pairing:


jks/25yearsmlc I will start a thread for you to post on, as an example. Let me know if you want it moved.

[labug]

So how does this affect the community aspect of this Online Community?