New Day Rising

[greatwhitenorth]

I'm looking for feedback on contacting H to set up a day of fishing.

Last time I saw H, the last thing we said to each other was about fishing. As he was saying "let me know when you want to get your butt kicked", I was saying "let me know when you want to take me out fishing." He'd said previously on the phone that "I'd take you fishing if I thought you would go", and said in an email that we need to come up with some dates for fishing. He clearly wants to go fishing with me.

I was always the organizer in our marriage (for us; he could organize the crap out of things to do with his buddies), but he didn't have a problem with that. It was actually one of the ways through which he pushed me away/utilized his walls, so I am a little bit reluctant to propose dates.

However, given the magnitude of what I suspect he's dealing with (repressed childhood sexual abuse - our history and things he said in our last conversation triggered and fit in every way with the research I've done since then), waiting for him to propose dates is *expecting* too much.

It's been almost four weeks, and bass season opens this weekend.

I'm thinking of sending a quick email to say "Good luck with the bass opener this weekend! Friend doesn't have a chance! If you get a pike I'd love to smoke it.

Let me know if June 30 or July 1 or 2 work for you to take me out. I could really use a day on the water. If those dates don't work, I'm free again after July 16 if you want to propose a couple of dates.

If you ever want to come for a swim let me know."

I'd really like your feedback about this before sending it. The swimming part might be too much...maybe something to say after fishing, if he bites.

Thanks!