Great, Brit! That's how I'm trying to handle things, too; no expectations, talk about things we have in common (as I would with any other friend), laugh more, etc. It's getting H to contact me more and confide in me about his life and family (kids).

I was always too strong and too fearful. My 180 now is to let down my defenses and trust more. If it doesn't result in a R, then it doesn't. But it is lowering my anxiety level when I have fewer expectations.

Good for you!

M:63
H:53
S:41, SS:28, SS:25, SD:23
M:15
T:16

Bomb:12/17/11, "I think we should go our separate ways."
H moves to his mother's house, 4/1/12
12/21/12: H moves back home, piecing