Indecision and the affair continues (part 3)

[Nblost]

kml, I basically told him they likely do have a better relationship than us because he's making an effort with her. I then broke down and left the room. H called after me and I know it bothered him that I was upset.

We saw the counselor. H said he believes we're on the path to divorce and he wants to introduce the kids to OW and her family so they can start making some fun plans as an integrated family.

Our counselor was great. He said H needs to get out of the house NOW. I've been enabling him too long and men will take advantage for as long as they can. I've been trying to say this to H for several months but it was great to have the counselor say it.

Our kids need to adjust to H being in his own place for 4-6 months before he should even think about introducing OW to them. They need to understand that we're splitting...otherwise, they could blame/hate her.

H and the counselor both said I've been amazingly calm and supportive through all of this...H said I've been "fantastic". ("great"...really glad I'm hitting it out of the park as a betrayed spouse)

H left and the counselor said it'll be very interesting to see how he reacts to truly separating from me. He hasn't had to face the reality of having his own place. I think H is a little scared. Counselor also said he needs a schedule and it's been unfair to me that he comes and goes as he pleases.

H seemed to accept what the counselor said, but I am guessing he's upset. I felt happy after the session...finally getting some movement on this. But, I'm also sad. However, I can tell trying to work on anything with H would be wasted effort and I'm truly not sure I want him back.

Very glad we got the counselor's advice.