This is not looking good! (Long post...)

[Accuray]

Thanks Bustingout! That's very nice of you and makes me feel great!

The worst thing is when she says she doesn't miss me and even despite her unhappiness she thinks she is doing the right thing. She has completely rewritten history so I caused every problem between us.

She misses you, but there is NO WAY she is going to admit that while you are pursuing. Remember that 8 feet of space I wrote about? You've encroached on it so she is pushing you farther away. She knows just what to say to make you feel badly. The only thing to read into those comments is that you are crowding her with your pursuit.

I certainly want the man I wanted to be or that she deserved a lot of the time.
The MC question has made me struggle. She said she'd go, but when I thought about it her breakdown comment scared me so much I rang back and told get not to worry about it. However, her comments about not missing me are so scary that I'm desperate to try it just to try something.

The irony is that the best thing you can do is nothing. You told her what you want and where you stand. If she's not deaf she heard you. Continuing to repeat and rephrase diminishes your message.

WRT MC, what you focus on expands. You both need to focus on happiness and positives right now. An MC is like a doctor, they look for and treat problems. When you focus on the problems, they gain importance and further justify how she is thinking. If you could go to a marriage cheerleading session that would celebrate everything the two of you did well, I would say go for it. Not MC, not now, its not time yet.

I'm so scared that she'll find someone else, she is doing a brilliant 180 on me which is leaving me floundering.

You cannot control is she meets someone else. You must surrender to that. You are the incumbent, you are the front runner. You can't build a fence around her to keep others out -- surrender to that.

She will NOT meet Prince Charming in the next three months. Focus and work on YOU!

Accuray