Yes, isn't it interesting how the PEA chemicals and infatuation wear off, and they see the OW as she is, finally, instead of the projections they imposed on her....
As far as the "emotion, openness, honesty" go, I found that although my H was much more open and emotional in his EA, it was largely because the MLCer is driven by pure emotions, like a teenager. Since going through the MLC he is more open and straightforward with me, but the intensity (which was really caused by everything being about him) is not over-the-top.
I'm curious about the subtle changes you see going on in your dynamic? Also, with regard to boundaries, I don't see much point in putting ultimatums on a man who is still in depression, as I think your H is; however, I do believe this is the time to be exploring what YOUR boundaries are, what you can/can't live with in a M.
Have you ever gone through the exercise of completely imagining your life without H? It took me a long time to get to the place where I could even do that, but once I was ready, it was so liberating to know that I could be fine without him if necessary. I changed, even my dreams changed, and I think he noticed that I behaved differently once I truly knew I didn't NEED him to be happy.
Glad to see you doing so well, and out of the emotional cycling!
