Thank your MIL for all of her help but that due to circumstances of your W's A, you cannot live like this.
"I also need to ask W if she wants a seperation or just go ahead w/the big D."
Just go for the separation yourself. Don't ask. Tell her you are separating because you refuse to be treated that way and then tell her what's going to happen. Start putting your foot down. Don't ask.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
I just had a weird dream, I dreamt that I found out that S7 is not mine. Then I started thinking maybe that's my W's dirty little secret. I started piecing things together, at the time S7 was conceived I was traveling very heavily and the W was working alot of hours in her new position at work.
A couple of weeks ago during one our recent arguments W mentioned briefly that our sex lives at that time S7 was conceived that she was surprised why I didn't doubt that S7 was mine. And I've noticed that lately she has really treated S7 and S12 differently. This right now is bothering me.
Is there a way to find out?
M44 / W43 Married 24 / Together 24.5 S12 S7 ILYBNILWY/Bomb: 4-15-2012 Counseling started 5-1-2012 Counseling ended 6-7-2012
"And I've noticed that lately she has really treated S7 and S12 differently."
You are bothered by the way your W is treating s7. IMO -- you should ask her why -- but you won't get the truth.
If that doesn't work -- and you have you suspicions -- maybe having a test performed. I am not saying you won't be s7 father or dad -- but the truth needs to be found out for possible medical reasons as well.
Now do the test only if you 1000% sure -- no matter how the results turn out -- YOU will NOT treat him any different then you have for the last 7 years.
Either way -- this is not an easy decision -- and not a good situation.
No need to hurry this decision as well -- but don't let this issue consume you in thought. You have enough going on with w.