I will have to go and read more of Amy's posts.....reading this was like she was writing about me. I have been wondering if my H is in MLC. (He wants out and I am trying to DB)....but now I'm starting to think I was in MLC a few years ago and this January marked my coming out of it. I have told H that I actually feel physiologically DIFFERENT (and better) than I have for a long time. Of course he thinks this is BS, but I cant explain it any other way. Could it be that what I thought was depression (and strict denial of such) was actually MLC?? I too have said horrible things and H doesn't understand how someone can even think those things, much less say them. But they were there in my mind and out of my mouth. And like Amy there were other horrible things I didn't say ( I never told him I hated him) they were definitely in my mind and yes, my actions spoke volumes to my H. So much so that he convinced himself that i wanted a D, which has never been true (though it was an occasional fantasy during that time i refer to as "when i had the crazies"). Since my "awakening" in Jan I can no longer imagine going back to the way I was.
M:39 H:39 S/15, S/11 (both adopted in 2004, my step-nephews, now our kids) M10, T13 Multiple bombs. Latest one 5/4/12, our 10th anniversary. Still living together and sharing a bed up until 7/18/12.
